Foreword by Dr. Phil McGraw
Attention deficit disorder (ADD) is a major challenge for many families in this century. The needs and unresolved challenges of children with ADD are affecting virtually every school in this nation, and a high number of adult issues in the workplace have been linked to adult ADD. Children are our most valuable asset, yet many of our children with the greatest potential are being left on the sidelines.
There is good reason to believe that there are multiple reasons for the upsurge of ADD. The growing toxicity of our nation, the breakdown of family stability, the increasing distractions of technology and video games, and the possible role of various viruses are all areas of concern. failure. Too often the label of ADD becomes a stigma of long-term problems that will never go away.
We are not doing enough as a nation to help children and families overcome the challenges of ADD. The majority of our convicts in prisons can be diagnosed with ADD, yet we have no programmes for children to avert this outcome or to offer adequate treatment. Most teachers and parents do not know what to do for children with ADD, although they are bright and eager to learn. Some parents are so frustrated in their dealings with the educational system that they have decided to homeschool their children.
Most people know me by some of my pet phrases, and one is very appropriate to the current ADD situation: Is this working for you. The fact is that no one fully understands the problem of ADD, only the symptoms.
What Dr. Lawlis is trying to do in this book is to help families understand their own child and what ADD means to them. He has recognised that this condition can mean many things and have many causes. Parents do not need academic explanations. They do not need prescriptions for a medication that may not work. And they certainly don.t need prescriptions for a medication that can have tragic side effects. Parents need an understanding of what their child is experiencing personally and a plan for the whole family to implement. Dr. Lawlis offers a step-by-step approach focused on accurate assessment and individualised solutions. In this way, progress can be measured and reinforced. He offers ways and methods to meet the educational and practical needs of children who suffer the academic and social stigma of ADD whatever their strengths or deficits. He supplies the biological and psychological basis for each approach, and he has also applied them in his own practise to be sure they are safe and effective.
But more than a gentle plan and personal assessments, this book offers the most advanced approaches available for the treatment of ADD. Perhaps it takes someone with a research background and clinical passion to be able to address and appreciate the progress that most people simply do not know about. Most of the innovations Dr. Lawlis describes have been widely used in the world of behavioural medicine, but they may take ten years or more to become common throughout the educational, psychiatric, and psychotherapeutic fields. But for the reader, they are accessible now in this book. Not all the paths Dr. Lawlis suggests are required for any one individual, but through concerted effort, the parent can become the expert and the child the hero.
And that is exactly what this book about ADD offers.
My approaches are based on how well people find solutions to the goals they set and then how effectively they act on those solutions. Are your family interactions improving. Is your child modifying his temper in the classroom or his acting out at the teacher.
Parents cannot remain in the denial stage one day longer.s needs known and become an active participant from now on. In order to do that, you need cutting-edge knowledge. The book you are now holding, in my personal and professional opinion, holds that knowledge.
Frank Lawlis. He was my major professor in my doctoral studies programme at the University of North Texas. He has been a trusted friend and mentor for almost thirty years.Fellow. in two divisions of the American Psychological Association for his scientific contributions in the field. Dr. Lawlis has created many of the behaviour medicine protocols for chronic pain, rehabilitation, and cancer that are practised throughout the world, and his new clinical research efforts are concentrating on neurological impairments, such as ADD.
Based on my trust in Dr. Make a plan, as Dr. Lawlis proposes, and create a purposeful direction. Make it work for you with a purpose.
Nothing comes easy that has true value, and your family is vitally important. Lawlis promises is a path of success. But you are going to have to find it. It will not be given to you, and it is unlikely that you will absorb all the answers you need in one reading or while you sleep.
Preface: Sharing the Journey
My birth was an ordeal for both my mother and me. She was given too much pain medication, by accident.
and still cannot. During most of the third, fourth, and fifth grades, my world was like Mardi Gras. When the teacher presented some topic for learning, my mind played tricks on me, such as counting every other word in her sentences, or making up new sentences, or finishing her sentences with my own version. Church represented a host of materials for my imagination, especially from the hymnals.
With the patience of Job, my father spent endless nights teaching me how to befriend numbers rather than fear them as my enemies.Write your numbers big enough so you can read them.. That task required some basics in organisation, too, because he also made me line my numbers up in some order.
Wow!) My mother was my cheerleader.
make it through.. (What else. What a concept! Two master.s degrees and a Ph.D.
But this book is not about my journey.ve met on their pilgrimages in the miracle we call life. One of the most incredible blessings in my life has been to witness people on their healing journeys.
The goal of life is not to be happy, because that is a transitory state. It may be difficult to witness your child attempting to cope with the challenges of ADD. It may trigger your own confrontation with what it means to be a parent. But you do have a choice in your reactions. You can choose to label yourself and your child as victims of a harsh and stupid disorder, or you can actually embrace the challenge to become a hero and a star who can model the best possible response. You can learn to trust yourself and your creative senses. You might even learn that you are truly beloved by God.
ONE
Taking a Step on the Healing Path
This book was written from my heart, soul, and mind for the sake of our children, because we are on the edge of crisis.
Being a good son, my first career choice was to be a traditional doctor. Many of these alternative treatments take longer than the typical seven minutes currently allowed in the doctor.s office, so the traditional medical solution.a pill.is usually prescribed without even a brochure explaining the medical alternatives.
In all truth, ADD cannot be treated in seven minutes or in seven days, and probably cannot be treated in a doctor.s office. It has to be approached in the home, where there is a higher calling than just getting a child to be quiet and conform to the rules for a while. This book, then, is written for the family. It offers new and exciting approaches, with action plans as well. But this is not a gift that cures the problem by itself. It is a path.a healing path that with effort and focus can and will shift the impact of your child.s ADD from disaster to growth as your child becomes the human being he or she is truly destined to be.
It is critical for you to keep something in mind from this point forward: you and your family can beat this thing. It will not destroy your lives, your values, or your dreams. God did not invest ADD with that kind of power over you. ADD is challenging. It is confusing.ve helped thousands of patients find hope and renewal.
Your job will be to stay strong and to keep things in perspective. This is a considerable challenge, but it is one you and your child can handle, just as others have. Remember, the measure of our character is how we respond to life.s challenges.
If you are a parent who is new to the challenges of ADD, you need to begin this journey with two guiding thoughts:
. You must commit yourself to a long and deep study of ADD. It impacts every realm of experience for you and your child.social, educational, and spiritual. So you must become both an expert and an advocate.
. You must be willing to reach out for help and support. Even the most determined people can do only so much. We all have limits to our reserves of courage and energy. Do not be too proud to ask for help or to vent your exasperation. The important thing is to protect your own mental and physical health because your child needs you.
By now you.ve realised that there is no quick fix.no healing gurus, no miracle cures. But there are scientific approaches that will offer relief.
Pledge to open your heart and mind so that you can understand and meet this challenge. Make this a positive journey of accomplishment for you, your child, and your family. Every parent wants to find the easiest path. But the reality is that life rarely allows for easy travel. As in the children.s tale The Velveteen Rabbit, it is only in wearing off our fur that we become real. In facing the challenge of ADD together, you will experience the privilege of truly getting to know your child and yourself. Believe me, that is a gift, regardless of what life throws at you later.
Many of the accepted treatments for helping kids with ADD put parents in the role of clowns in a three-ring circus. Physicians say one thing, teachers say something else, friends and family have their own opinions. Suggestions, recommendations, and diagnoses fly at you from all directions, but no one seems to fully grasp what works and doesn.t work.
Parents of ADD children often talk of the emotional roller coaster they experience in searching for answers and in trying to determine what is right and what is wrong for their children. Many have endured criticism for trying different approaches when the recommended treatments appear to fail. They feel trapped in a no-win situation when an approach that has worked for others does not help their own children. At times when they most need support and praise for their efforts, they feel ashamed and damned.
This disorder often disrupts the normal life of a family. Certainly not every ADD family is dysfunctional, but the insidious nature of this condition can disrupt basic communication. Even the most loving family relationships can be thrown dramatically askew. Sometimes parents tend to focus so much on the needs of an ADD child that the needs of other siblings are neglected. When a family becomes dependent on outside expertise from psychiatrists, psychologists, teachers, and school counsellors, that can undermine its healthy sense of self-reliance and disrupt its decision-making processes. Never knowing what to expect from an ADD child from day to day also disrupts a household. Trust can erode.
ADD can tear at the fabric of a family by undermining parental authority and creating suspicion and doubt. Yet we know, too, that challenges like ADD often strengthen familial bonds.ve seen family members rally around one another with compassion and dedication. This book will give your family the tools and the guidance to make the best of your experience with ADD.
The Diagnosis
The scenarios of discovery don.t vary greatly from one family to the next. Often a teacher sounds the first alarm by alerting parents to the fact that a child is disruptive in class. Within the first month of a school year, the label attention deficit disorder becomes associated with the child. The parents are given behavioural reports from the school and are encouraged to consult a physician or psychologist. Over the course of the next six months the child is put under a microscope and the family is subjected to an overload of stress as they attempt to grapple with this new development.
In the majority of my cases, the family quickly begins to experience conflicts and doubt. Their conventional understanding of what constitutes good and bad behaviour for a child is tossed out. The child once seen as beautiful and precious is suddenly cast as abnormal. The blame game begins soon thereafter. Parents and teachers are often at odds over their responsibilities. This is a dangerous time. When the adults in a child.s life become completely focused on negative behaviour, the youngster.s self-image deteriorates. The child can give up hope of ever being good or normal when his parents and teachers seem to perceive everything he does as bad or aberrant. You cannot allow this to happen.
A Disorder, Not a Disaster
The modern terms attention deficit disorder (ADD) and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) are often used interchangeably, but they have subtle differences. Actually, ADD is typically used for the lack of attention abilities, while ADHD usually refers to the hyperactive behaviour often attributable to the lack of concentration. The condition has undergone many name changes over the past century. First described by Heinrich Hoffmann in the nineteenth century, in a poem about Fidgety Philip, the disorder and its implications have not been fully appreciated until the last ten to twenty years. Today, attention deficit disorder is understood to be a neurological disorder. It is typically mild as far as direct brain symptoms, such as seizures or paralysis, are concerned, and the child functions normally in most daily activities and has age- appropriate skills. But ADD has extensive ramifications for a child.s learning processes.
An ADD diagnosis means that the child.s brain is not functioning normally. ADD is not a sign of inferior intelligence. It is not a handicap. It does not result in a damaged personality, criminal tendencies, or immoral behaviour. And it is not necessarily a learning disability or a mark of mental immaturity, although such conditions can coexist with ADD. Much of the time, the problems of ADD are related to the brain performing at lowered, subdued ranges.
Brain performance is usually discussed in four ranges of measurable electromagnetic activity. These output ranges, called .states,. are Beta, Alpha, Theta, and Delta.
Beta State. This is the highest range of brain activity. This brain state measures greater than 13 hertz (or cycles per second), and this is the output that occurs during most of the day. You are producing Beta waves when you are problem solving and actively thinking.
Alpha State. This is called the relaxation or calm state (8.12 hertz) because there is a perceptible tranquil sense that you experience as you enter this state. You may remember the Alpha machines that were popular a few years ago as aids to help people relax and fight stress.
Theta State. When you are in a trance, similar to that period just before you fall asleep, in a kind of .twilight. time, you have entered the Theta state (4.8 hertz). This is the state of hypnotic effect, where realities blur and the imageries of dreams are created. Consequently, this is the state when creativity is highest, because the obstacles of rationality and objectivity no longer restrict you.
Thomas Edison used an unusual technique to achieve a Theta state for solving his problems. It sounds awkward, but he would hold pebbles in his fists while supporting his head on his wrists above a bowl of water. Just before he dozed off, his fists would relax enough so that the pebbles would fall into the water. The water would splash up into his face and keep him just close enough to the waking state, while still in the Theta zone, for him to view a problem in more insightful ways.
Delta State. This is the slowest range (0.2.4 hertz), but you are fully asleep during this phase. There are lower levels within the sleep stages, but suffice it to say that Delta is not usually a state that psychologists consider as related to the issues of ADD.
The Brain Stuck in Overdrive
With attention deficit disorder, the brain is functioning in the Alpha and Theta ranges most of the time, even when it is more appropriate to be in the higher ranges, such as when the child is at school and solving problems.
Your child.s ADD brain, then, is like a car stuck in overdrive. Your child can.t use the power of the engine to get over the hill. He may feel as if he is caught in mud up to his knees while being expected to run a hundred-yard dash. No wonder he gets frustrated and acts out!
ADD children are hyperactive not because their brains are operating in high gear, but because they can.t shift into high gear. Their mental engines are bogged down. Their normal methods for stimulating the brain aren.t working, so they try other ways to step on the gas. They engage in risky behaviours, get into fights, and challenge authority.anything they can do to create an excited state. They create stress, and then their adrenal glands kick in and raise the brain activity to a higher level.
Children love to run and play. Movement gives them pleasure. This is especially true for children with ADD. They crave excitement as a means for stimulating their lethargic brains. They eat gobs of sweets because sugar offers a quick fix. Unfortunately, their energy drops rapidly once the sugar high fades.
For some children, certain parts of the brain connexions in the administrative and memory parts run at a lower rate than normal; but they may not feel drowsy, because their muscles and organs are still charged with energy. Children experiencing this condition do not feel particularly unpleasant, but their conscious thoughts are in that dreamlike state of free association, with the boundaries between reality and dreams broken down. We.ve all experienced a similar state of consciousness as we drift off to sleep.
An Imaginative State
Tune in to the internal dialogues of two children in geometry class. Jane.s brain is in a normal state, conducive to learning. Jill.s is in an ADD mode.
As the geometry teacher explains how to find the area of a circle, Jane follows the teacher. That is called the diameter, and half of that is called the radius.), or about 22/7.
But if you were to tune in to Jill.s finger.s party. Oh yeah, Joe is sitting over there and he is looking at me. Oh darn! The teacher is looking at me. Oh darn! Let.s see. Radius squared times pi. What was pi again. Maybe it is called pi because it looks like a pie.
Jill, the child with ADD, is in an imaginative state. But it is not the proper time to be creative. It is the time to focus and learn in very precise steps. If Jill misses a step, she becomes anxious. She then tries to focus and regain lost ground, but she is unable to break free of the free- associative state. This inability to control mental tracking explains why a child with ADD is forgetful, cannot concentrate, becomes bored quickly, and is easily distracted. Since most of us do not have trouble focusing our minds, we assume a child who is so easily distracted is simply inattentive, lazy, or lacking in self-discipline.
Treatment for ADD
When your child has a neurological problem, you might expect that you.d find a doctor who could assess the problem and prescribe a treatment plan to remedy it. A parent might also expect that teachers would have specific methods for helping children with memory and concentration problems, since it is estimated that 3.6 percent of all students have a form of this problem. In most areas of medical treatment and in most schools, there are specific therapies and organised programmes for helping children with special needs. But as parents of ADD children have discovered, specific therapies and organised programmes too often do not exist for them. No wonder there is so much anger and frustration expressed by families dealing with ADD.
Does Your Child Have ADD.
Parents of children with ADD can become exasperated very early on because it is often difficult to determine if a child truly has attention deficit disorder. According to a widely accepted checklist, ADD should be considered if the child often
. fails to pay close attention to details or makes careless mistakes in schoolwork or in other activities
. avoids, dislikes, or is reluctant to engage in tasks that require sustained concentration and effort
. does not seem to listen when directly spoken to
. does not often follow through on instructions and fails to finish schoolwork, chores, or duties
. has difficulty organising tasks and activities
. loses things necessary for tasks or activities
. is forgetful in daily activities
These recognisable symptoms have been accepted as indicators of ADD for a number of years now as part of an effort to standardise the diagnosis.ve used them in my practise as a clinical psychologist. However, the same symptoms also relate to the following conditions:
delirium, dementia, amnesic and other cognitive disorders
mental disorders due to a medical condition
disorders related to substance abuse
schizophrenia and other psychotic disorders
mood disorders (including depression, dysthymia, and bipolar disorder)
anxiety disorders
dissociative disorders
sleep disorders
adjustment disorders
personality disorders
The pointm making is that ADD is merely a name assigned to a long list of dysfunctional behaviours. It does not refer to any specific cause for the behaviour. The paradox of scientific medicine is that a diagnosis does not guarantee a cause-and-effect. All children have these symptoms at times, especially during high-stress periods. What child hasn.t become distracted and lost concentration at one time or another. Every boy and girl is forgetful at times. Every child has experienced difficulty getting organised, following instructions, or focusing on the task at hand. And that is exactly why identifying and treating children who are truly afflicted with ADD is such a challenge. Far too many children are labelled as suffering from ADD without scientific justification. The symptoms in that checklist can apply to a whole host of kids who may just be slow to mature or have poor stress management skills.
There is a very real possibility that your child was checked off as a troublemaker by a teacher faced with the daunting task not only of educating each student to her full potential, but also of meeting the political goals of the school system and its standardised-achievement testing system. There are many demands on teachers, and most teachers have too few resources. They are often pulled in opposite directions.
Still,m afraid that many teachers mislabel young people as having ADD because they don.t have the time or the resources to develop real expertise. When a teacher is trying to educate thirty-five students and one of them is working against her by acting out, the understandable temptation is to apply a label, to solve the problem by categorising the offending student.s behaviour. But it is dangerous to label a child without a scientific basis for the diagnosis, and too often the treatment that follows treats only the symptoms and not the person afflicted.
s deficits and the treatments that are available for it.
You Are Not Alone, and There Is Hope
The first fact parents of ADD children should know is that they are not alone. There are an estimated 17 million children diagnosed with ADD in the United States, and the number increases every day. Generally, this is not a condition that can be outgrown. Nor can it be prevented by vaccination or cured simply by making lifestyle adjustments.
The second helpful fact parents should know is that while there.s no treatment approach that works for all children, there are strategies that do work and that can be combined to create an effective programme for their child. ADD is a grab-bag, catchall term for a series of troublesome problems, just as the common cold is really the name we have given to a series of symptoms that include a runny nose, stuffed sinuses, sneezing, coughing, and body ache. And just as one person.s surefire cold remedy may have no effect on another person.s symptoms,ve discovered that there is no one remedy for ADD. But there are treatment methods that work in specific cases. The good news is that although ADD raises many questions, this book has many answers. Together, we will find the solution for your child.
Medication Is Not the Long-term Answer
Americans are living longer and in better health than ever before. So why is ADD on the rise.
Far too many children are being drugged as a solution to the symptoms of ADD. We are a society addicted to quick fixes and magic pills. It.s one thing to do that to ourselves, but now we seem to be doing it to our children too. Sales of prescription drugs such as Ritalin and other medicines for childhood neurological and psychological disorders are huge. Ritalin sales alone increased by 122 percent, and depression medications for children increased 5 percent, in one year alone (2000.2001).
In 2003 the National Institutes of Health (NIH) announced that Americans spend more on medications for their children than for the elderly. Are we using drugs to control our children.s behaviour instead of being responsible parents. Do we want our young people to rely on the magic of chemistry to regulate their behaviour, or do we want them to naturally develop the discipline and focus necessary for them to contribute to society.
Most responsible school counsellors and paediatricians feel that drugs for ADD should be used only as a last resort, and they recognise that even if they do work in younger children, their effectiveness will be minimised by the teenage years. In other words, drugs are not the total answer. They cannot remedy negative environmental factors, family conflicts, or educational failures.
The risks of poor treatment are real. If your child has ADD, it is certainly a personal problem for you. And it is a crisis for your child.s future. Without effective treatment, the risks associated with ADD are very great. Children with ADD can fall out of the mainstream of positive social, educational, and emotional life with their peers and family members. ADD is also a problem for society as a whole. The challenges associated with this affliction have enormous implications. The following numbers are taken from the Attention Deficit Disorder Association and from material provided by Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD):
. 35 percent of students with ADD never finish high school.
. Individuals with ADD have significantly more hospital visits than those without it.
. Parents of ADD children divorce three times more often than the general population.
. 50 to 75 percent of incarcerated inmates in prisons have some form of ADD.
. 52 percent of ADD sufferers abuse drugs at some time in their lives.
. 43 percent of male ADD students are arrested for a felony before the age of sixteen.
The costs of ADD and ADHD are reflected in the entire family medical profile. According to a study published in 5090cm the Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, .Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder: Increased Costs for Patients and Their Families,. families who had a child diagnosed with ADHD had the following results:
. Family members (not counting the patient with ADHD) had 60 percent more medical claims, and twice as many were treated for some type of psychiatric disorder.
. Direct annual medical care costs per family member were twice as high ($2,060 vs. $1,026).
. Indirect costs for disability and absenteeism in ADHD families were 61 percent higher.
. Patients with the diagnosis had 2.2 times more medical claims than non-ADHD patients.
The statistics are staggering, but you and your child can avoid being included in these numbers.
The Plan
ve created a step-by-step plan for dealing with your child.s ADD. It is based on three approaches: audit, action, and assessment. Each chapter introduces a new step on the path, and each includes an audit, to help you clarify potential sources of your child.s behaviour; action, or activities that offer specific strategies of change that can be implemented immediately; and assessments, to help you evaluate whether the plan is working.
The chapters are organised so that important pathways can be charted and easily reviewed. Since every child is unique, any treatment plan needs to be specially fitted to the individual. In my experience most children benefit from the use of more than one approach.
This book combines the best of what traditional and alternative medicine have to offer at this time.First, do no harm.ll offer my advice and suggestions on methods that include drugs and medications, counselling and biofeedback, electromagnetic treatments, biocleansing, nutritional adjustments, strategies for sleep disturbances, neurotherapy, and self-development management.
Together, we will create an individualised assessment of the ADD symptoms for your child. Together, we will create a plan for treatment.ve all been used successfully and all are based on scientific methodology.
Family Healing
s symptoms. It may take time to find a treatment or a combination of treatments that work for your child. A parent.s impatience with treatment can be misinterpreted by the ADD child as a criticism. You don.t want your child to fear that his parents have lost hope.
s symptoms are treatable. The treatment path you follow on this journey to a better life for your ADD child may very well bring your family closer together than it has ever been.ve seen it happen many times. At some junctures the important challenges may be related not to the symptom resolutions of ADD, but to the personal or interpersonal growth of the family. If that is all that happens, that is enough, because that is what will endure.
--This text refers to the Paperback edition. Show moreForeword by Dr. Phil McGraw
Attention deficit disorder (ADD) is a major challenge for many families in this century. The needs and unresolved challenges of children with ADD are affecting virtually every school in this nation, and a high number of adult issues in the workplace have been linked to adult ADD. Children are our most valuable asset, yet many of our children with the greatest potential are being left on the sidelines.
There is good reason to believe that there are multiple reasons for the upsurge of ADD. The growing toxicity of our nation, the breakdown of family stability, the increasing distractions of technology and video games, and the possible role of various viruses are all areas of concern. failure. Too often the label of ADD becomes a stigma of long-term problems that will never go away.
We are not doing enough as a nation to help children and families overcome the challenges of ADD. The majority of our convicts in prisons can be diagnosed with ADD, yet we have no programmes for children to avert this outcome or to offer adequate treatment. Most teachers and parents do not know what to do for children with ADD, although they are bright and eager to learn. Some parents are so frustrated in their dealings with the educational system that they have decided to homeschool their children.
Most people know me by some of my pet phrases, and one is very appropriate to the current ADD situation: Is this working for you. The fact is that no one fully understands the problem of ADD, only the symptoms.
What Dr. Lawlis is trying to do in this book is to help families understand their own child and what ADD means to them. He has recognised that this condition can mean many things and have many causes. Parents do not need academic explanations. They do not need prescriptions for a medication that may not work. And they certainly don.t need prescriptions for a medication that can have tragic side effects. Parents need an understanding of what their child is experiencing personally and a plan for the whole family to implement. Dr. Lawlis offers a step-by-step approach focused on accurate assessment and individualised solutions. In this way, progress can be measured and reinforced. He offers ways and methods to meet the educational and practical needs of children who suffer the academic and social stigma of ADD whatever their strengths or deficits. He supplies the biological and psychological basis for each approach, and he has also applied them in his own practise to be sure they are safe and effective.
But more than a gentle plan and personal assessments, this book offers the most advanced approaches available for the treatment of ADD. Perhaps it takes someone with a research background and clinical passion to be able to address and appreciate the progress that most people simply do not know about. Most of the innovations Dr. Lawlis describes have been widely used in the world of behavioural medicine, but they may take ten years or more to become common throughout the educational, psychiatric, and psychotherapeutic fields. But for the reader, they are accessible now in this book. Not all the paths Dr. Lawlis suggests are required for any one individual, but through concerted effort, the parent can become the expert and the child the hero.
And that is exactly what this book about ADD offers.
My approaches are based on how well people find solutions to the goals they set and then how effectively they act on those solutions. Are your family interactions improving. Is your child modifying his temper in the classroom or his acting out at the teacher.
Parents cannot remain in the denial stage one day longer.s needs known and become an active participant from now on. In order to do that, you need cutting-edge knowledge. The book you are now holding, in my personal and professional opinion, holds that knowledge.
Frank Lawlis. He was my major professor in my doctoral studies programme at the University of North Texas. He has been a trusted friend and mentor for almost thirty years.Fellow. in two divisions of the American Psychological Association for his scientific contributions in the field. Dr. Lawlis has created many of the behaviour medicine protocols for chronic pain, rehabilitation, and cancer that are practised throughout the world, and his new clinical research efforts are concentrating on neurological impairments, such as ADD.
Based on my trust in Dr. Make a plan, as Dr. Lawlis proposes, and create a purposeful direction. Make it work for you with a purpose.
Nothing comes easy that has true value, and your family is vitally important. Lawlis promises is a path of success. But you are going to have to find it. It will not be given to you, and it is unlikely that you will absorb all the answers you need in one reading or while you sleep.
Preface: Sharing the Journey
My birth was an ordeal for both my mother and me. She was given too much pain medication, by accident.
and still cannot. During most of the third, fourth, and fifth grades, my world was like Mardi Gras. When the teacher presented some topic for learning, my mind played tricks on me, such as counting every other word in her sentences, or making up new sentences, or finishing her sentences with my own version. Church represented a host of materials for my imagination, especially from the hymnals.
With the patience of Job, my father spent endless nights teaching me how to befriend numbers rather than fear them as my enemies.Write your numbers big enough so you can read them.. That task required some basics in organisation, too, because he also made me line my numbers up in some order.
Wow!) My mother was my cheerleader.
make it through.. (What else. What a concept! Two master.s degrees and a Ph.D.
But this book is not about my journey.ve met on their pilgrimages in the miracle we call life. One of the most incredible blessings in my life has been to witness people on their healing journeys.
The goal of life is not to be happy, because that is a transitory state. It may be difficult to witness your child attempting to cope with the challenges of ADD. It may trigger your own confrontation with what it means to be a parent. But you do have a choice in your reactions. You can choose to label yourself and your child as victims of a harsh and stupid disorder, or you can actually embrace the challenge to become a hero and a star who can model the best possible response. You can learn to trust yourself and your creative senses. You might even learn that you are truly beloved by God.
ONE
Taking a Step on the Healing Path
This book was written from my heart, soul, and mind for the sake of our children, because we are on the edge of crisis.
Being a good son, my first career choice was to be a traditional doctor. Many of these alternative treatments take longer than the typical seven minutes currently allowed in the doctor.s office, so the traditional medical solution.a pill.is usually prescribed without even a brochure explaining the medical alternatives.
In all truth, ADD cannot be treated in seven minutes or in seven days, and probably cannot be treated in a doctor.s office. It has to be approached in the home, where there is a higher calling than just getting a child to be quiet and conform to the rules for a while. This book, then, is written for the family. It offers new and exciting approaches, with action plans as well. But this is not a gift that cures the problem by itself. It is a path.a healing path that with effort and focus can and will shift the impact of your child.s ADD from disaster to growth as your child becomes the human being he or she is truly destined to be.
It is critical for you to keep something in mind from this point forward: you and your family can beat this thing. It will not destroy your lives, your values, or your dreams. God did not invest ADD with that kind of power over you. ADD is challenging. It is confusing.ve helped thousands of patients find hope and renewal.
Your job will be to stay strong and to keep things in perspective. This is a considerable challenge, but it is one you and your child can handle, just as others have. Remember, the measure of our character is how we respond to life.s challenges.
If you are a parent who is new to the challenges of ADD, you need to begin this journey with two guiding thoughts:
. You must commit yourself to a long and deep study of ADD. It impacts every realm of experience for you and your child.social, educational, and spiritual. So you must become both an expert and an advocate.
. You must be willing to reach out for help and support. Even the most determined people can do only so much. We all have limits to our reserves of courage and energy. Do not be too proud to ask for help or to vent your exasperation. The important thing is to protect your own mental and physical health because your child needs you.
By now you.ve realised that there is no quick fix.no healing gurus, no miracle cures. But there are scientific approaches that will offer relief.
Pledge to open your heart and mind so that you can understand and meet this challenge. Make this a positive journey of accomplishment for you, your child, and your family. Every parent wants to find the easiest path. But the reality is that life rarely allows for easy travel. As in the children.s tale The Velveteen Rabbit, it is only in wearing off our fur that we become real. In facing the challenge of ADD together, you will experience the privilege of truly getting to know your child and yourself. Believe me, that is a gift, regardless of what life throws at you later.
Many of the accepted treatments for helping kids with ADD put parents in the role of clowns in a three-ring circus. Physicians say one thing, teachers say something else, friends and family have their own opinions. Suggestions, recommendations, and diagnoses fly at you from all directions, but no one seems to fully grasp what works and doesn.t work.
Parents of ADD children often talk of the emotional roller coaster they experience in searching for answers and in trying to determine what is right and what is wrong for their children. Many have endured criticism for trying different approaches when the recommended treatments appear to fail. They feel trapped in a no-win situation when an approach that has worked for others does not help their own children. At times when they most need support and praise for their efforts, they feel ashamed and damned.
This disorder often disrupts the normal life of a family. Certainly not every ADD family is dysfunctional, but the insidious nature of this condition can disrupt basic communication. Even the most loving family relationships can be thrown dramatically askew. Sometimes parents tend to focus so much on the needs of an ADD child that the needs of other siblings are neglected. When a family becomes dependent on outside expertise from psychiatrists, psychologists, teachers, and school counsellors, that can undermine its healthy sense of self-reliance and disrupt its decision-making processes. Never knowing what to expect from an ADD child from day to day also disrupts a household. Trust can erode.
ADD can tear at the fabric of a family by undermining parental authority and creating suspicion and doubt. Yet we know, too, that challenges like ADD often strengthen familial bonds.ve seen family members rally around one another with compassion and dedication. This book will give your family the tools and the guidance to make the best of your experience with ADD.
The Diagnosis
The scenarios of discovery don.t vary greatly from one family to the next. Often a teacher sounds the first alarm by alerting parents to the fact that a child is disruptive in class. Within the first month of a school year, the label attention deficit disorder becomes associated with the child. The parents are given behavioural reports from the school and are encouraged to consult a physician or psychologist. Over the course of the next six months the child is put under a microscope and the family is subjected to an overload of stress as they attempt to grapple with this new development.
In the majority of my cases, the family quickly begins to experience conflicts and doubt. Their conventional understanding of what constitutes good and bad behaviour for a child is tossed out. The child once seen as beautiful and precious is suddenly cast as abnormal. The blame game begins soon thereafter. Parents and teachers are often at odds over their responsibilities. This is a dangerous time. When the adults in a child.s life become completely focused on negative behaviour, the youngster.s self-image deteriorates. The child can give up hope of ever being good or normal when his parents and teachers seem to perceive everything he does as bad or aberrant. You cannot allow this to happen.
A Disorder, Not a Disaster
The modern terms attention deficit disorder (ADD) and attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) are often used interchangeably, but they have subtle differences. Actually, ADD is typically used for the lack of attention abilities, while ADHD usually refers to the hyperactive behaviour often attributable to the lack of concentration. The condition has undergone many name changes over the past century. First described by Heinrich Hoffmann in the nineteenth century, in a poem about Fidgety Philip, the disorder and its implications have not been fully appreciated until the last ten to twenty years. Today, attention deficit disorder is understood to be a neurological disorder. It is typically mild as far as direct brain symptoms, such as seizures or paralysis, are concerned, and the child functions normally in most daily activities and has age- appropriate skills. But ADD has extensive ramifications for a child.s learning processes.
An ADD diagnosis means that the child.s brain is not functioning normally. ADD is not a sign of inferior intelligence. It is not a handicap. It does not result in a damaged personality, criminal tendencies, or immoral behaviour. And it is not necessarily a learning disability or a mark of mental immaturity, although such conditions can coexist with ADD. Much of the time, the problems of ADD are related to the brain performing at lowered, subdued ranges.
Brain performance is usually discussed in four ranges of measurable electromagnetic activity. These output ranges, called .states,. are Beta, Alpha, Theta, and Delta.
Beta State. This is the highest range of brain activity. This brain state measures greater than 13 hertz (or cycles per second), and this is the output that occurs during most of the day. You are producing Beta waves when you are problem solving and actively thinking.
Alpha State. This is called the relaxation or calm state (8.12 hertz) because there is a perceptible tranquil sense that you experience as you enter this state. You may remember the Alpha machines that were popular a few years ago as aids to help people relax and fight stress.
Theta State. When you are in a trance, similar to that period just before you fall asleep, in a kind of .twilight. time, you have entered the Theta state (4.8 hertz). This is the state of hypnotic effect, where realities blur and the imageries of dreams are created. Consequently, this is the state when creativity is highest, because the obstacles of rationality and objectivity no longer restrict you.
Thomas Edison used an unusual technique to achieve a Theta state for solving his problems. It sounds awkward, but he would hold pebbles in his fists while supporting his head on his wrists above a bowl of water. Just before he dozed off, his fists would relax enough so that the pebbles would fall into the water. The water would splash up into his face and keep him just close enough to the waking state, while still in the Theta zone, for him to view a problem in more insightful ways.
Delta State. This is the slowest range (0.2.4 hertz), but you are fully asleep during this phase. There are lower levels within the sleep stages, but suffice it to say that Delta is not usually a state that psychologists consider as related to the issues of ADD.
The Brain Stuck in Overdrive
With attention deficit disorder, the brain is functioning in the Alpha and Theta ranges most of the time, even when it is more appropriate to be in the higher ranges, such as when the child is at school and solving problems.
Your child.s ADD brain, then, is like a car stuck in overdrive. Your child can.t use the power of the engine to get over the hill. He may feel as if he is caught in mud up to his knees while being expected to run a hundred-yard dash. No wonder he gets frustrated and acts out!
ADD children are hyperactive not because their brains are operating in high gear, but because they can.t shift into high gear. Their mental engines are bogged down. Their normal methods for stimulating the brain aren.t working, so they try other ways to step on the gas. They engage in risky behaviours, get into fights, and challenge authority.anything they can do to create an excited state. They create stress, and then their adrenal glands kick in and raise the brain activity to a higher level.
Children love to run and play. Movement gives them pleasure. This is especially true for children with ADD. They crave excitement as a means for stimulating their lethargic brains. They eat gobs of sweets because sugar offers a quick fix. Unfortunately, their energy drops rapidly once the sugar high fades.
For some children, certain parts of the brain connexions in the administrative and memory parts run at a lower rate than normal; but they may not feel drowsy, because their muscles and organs are still charged with energy. Children experiencing this condition do not feel particularly unpleasant, but their conscious thoughts are in that dreamlike state of free association, with the boundaries between reality and dreams broken down. We.ve all experienced a similar state of consciousness as we drift off to sleep.
An Imaginative State
Tune in to the internal dialogues of two children in geometry class. Jane.s brain is in a normal state, conducive to learning. Jill.s is in an ADD mode.
As the geometry teacher explains how to find the area of a circle, Jane follows the teacher. That is called the diameter, and half of that is called the radius.), or about 22/7.
But if you were to tune in to Jill.s finger.s party. Oh yeah, Joe is sitting over there and he is looking at me. Oh darn! The teacher is looking at me. Oh darn! Let.s see. Radius squared times pi. What was pi again. Maybe it is called pi because it looks like a pie.
Jill, the child with ADD, is in an imaginative state. But it is not the proper time to be creative. It is the time to focus and learn in very precise steps. If Jill misses a step, she becomes anxious. She then tries to focus and regain lost ground, but she is unable to break free of the free- associative state. This inability to control mental tracking explains why a child with ADD is forgetful, cannot concentrate, becomes bored quickly, and is easily distracted. Since most of us do not have trouble focusing our minds, we assume a child who is so easily distracted is simply inattentive, lazy, or lacking in self-discipline.
Treatment for ADD
When your child has a neurological problem, you might expect that you.d find a doctor who could assess the problem and prescribe a treatment plan to remedy it. A parent might also expect that teachers would have specific methods for helping children with memory and concentration problems, since it is estimated that 3.6 percent of all students have a form of this problem. In most areas of medical treatment and in most schools, there are specific therapies and organised programmes for helping children with special needs. But as parents of ADD children have discovered, specific therapies and organised programmes too often do not exist for them. No wonder there is so much anger and frustration expressed by families dealing with ADD.
Does Your Child Have ADD.
Parents of children with ADD can become exasperated very early on because it is often difficult to determine if a child truly has attention deficit disorder. According to a widely accepted checklist, ADD should be considered if the child often
. fails to pay close attention to details or makes careless mistakes in schoolwork or in other activities
. avoids, dislikes, or is reluctant to engage in tasks that require sustained concentration and effort
. does not seem to listen when directly spoken to
. does not often follow through on instructions and fails to finish schoolwork, chores, or duties
. has difficulty organising tasks and activities
. loses things necessary for tasks or activities
. is forgetful in daily activities
These recognisable symptoms have been accepted as indicators of ADD for a number of years now as part of an effort to standardise the diagnosis.ve used them in my practise as a clinical psychologist. However, the same symptoms also relate to the following conditions:
delirium, dementia, amnesic and other cognitive disorders
mental disorders due to a medical condition
disorders related to substance abuse
schizophrenia and other psychotic disorders
mood disorders (including depression, dysthymia, and bipolar disorder)
anxiety disorders
dissociative disorders
sleep disorders
adjustment disorders
personality disorders
The pointm making is that ADD is merely a name assigned to a long list of dysfunctional behaviours. It does not refer to any specific cause for the behaviour. The paradox of scientific medicine is that a diagnosis does not guarantee a cause-and-effect. All children have these symptoms at times, especially during high-stress periods. What child hasn.t become distracted and lost concentration at one time or another. Every boy and girl is forgetful at times. Every child has experienced difficulty getting organised, following instructions, or focusing on the task at hand. And that is exactly why identifying and treating children who are truly afflicted with ADD is such a challenge. Far too many children are labelled as suffering from ADD without scientific justification. The symptoms in that checklist can apply to a whole host of kids who may just be slow to mature or have poor stress management skills.
There is a very real possibility that your child was checked off as a troublemaker by a teacher faced with the daunting task not only of educating each student to her full potential, but also of meeting the political goals of the school system and its standardised-achievement testing system. There are many demands on teachers, and most teachers have too few resources. They are often pulled in opposite directions.
Still,m afraid that many teachers mislabel young people as having ADD because they don.t have the time or the resources to develop real expertise. When a teacher is trying to educate thirty-five students and one of them is working against her by acting out, the understandable temptation is to apply a label, to solve the problem by categorising the offending student.s behaviour. But it is dangerous to label a child without a scientific basis for the diagnosis, and too often the treatment that follows treats only the symptoms and not the person afflicted.
s deficits and the treatments that are available for it.
You Are Not Alone, and There Is Hope
The first fact parents of ADD children should know is that they are not alone. There are an estimated 17 million children diagnosed with ADD in the United States, and the number increases every day. Generally, this is not a condition that can be outgrown. Nor can it be prevented by vaccination or cured simply by making lifestyle adjustments.
The second helpful fact parents should know is that while there.s no treatment approach that works for all children, there are strategies that do work and that can be combined to create an effective programme for their child. ADD is a grab-bag, catchall term for a series of troublesome problems, just as the common cold is really the name we have given to a series of symptoms that include a runny nose, stuffed sinuses, sneezing, coughing, and body ache. And just as one person.s surefire cold remedy may have no effect on another person.s symptoms,ve discovered that there is no one remedy for ADD. But there are treatment methods that work in specific cases. The good news is that although ADD raises many questions, this book has many answers. Together, we will find the solution for your child.
Medication Is Not the Long-term Answer
Americans are living longer and in better health than ever before. So why is ADD on the rise.
Far too many children are being drugged as a solution to the symptoms of ADD. We are a society addicted to quick fixes and magic pills. It.s one thing to do that to ourselves, but now we seem to be doing it to our children too. Sales of prescription drugs such as Ritalin and other medicines for childhood neurological and psychological disorders are huge. Ritalin sales alone increased by 122 percent, and depression medications for children increased 5 percent, in one year alone (2000.2001).
In 2003 the National Institutes of Health (NIH) announced that Americans spend more on medications for their children than for the elderly. Are we using drugs to control our children.s behaviour instead of being responsible parents. Do we want our young people to rely on the magic of chemistry to regulate their behaviour, or do we want them to naturally develop the discipline and focus necessary for them to contribute to society.
Most responsible school counsellors and paediatricians feel that drugs for ADD should be used only as a last resort, and they recognise that even if they do work in younger children, their effectiveness will be minimised by the teenage years. In other words, drugs are not the total answer. They cannot remedy negative environmental factors, family conflicts, or educational failures.
The risks of poor treatment are real. If your child has ADD, it is certainly a personal problem for you. And it is a crisis for your child.s future. Without effective treatment, the risks associated with ADD are very great. Children with ADD can fall out of the mainstream of positive social, educational, and emotional life with their peers and family members. ADD is also a problem for society as a whole. The challenges associated with this affliction have enormous implications. The following numbers are taken from the Attention Deficit Disorder Association and from material provided by Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD):
. 35 percent of students with ADD never finish high school.
. Individuals with ADD have significantly more hospital visits than those without it.
. Parents of ADD children divorce three times more often than the general population.
. 50 to 75 percent of incarcerated inmates in prisons have some form of ADD.
. 52 percent of ADD sufferers abuse drugs at some time in their lives.
. 43 percent of male ADD students are arrested for a felony before the age of sixteen.
The costs of ADD and ADHD are reflected in the entire family medical profile. According to a study published in 5090cm the Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, .Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder: Increased Costs for Patients and Their Families,. families who had a child diagnosed with ADHD had the following results:
. Family members (not counting the patient with ADHD) had 60 percent more medical claims, and twice as many were treated for some type of psychiatric disorder.
. Direct annual medical care costs per family member were twice as high ($2,060 vs. $1,026).
. Indirect costs for disability and absenteeism in ADHD families were 61 percent higher.
. Patients with the diagnosis had 2.2 times more medical claims than non-ADHD patients.
The statistics are staggering, but you and your child can avoid being included in these numbers.
The Plan
ve created a step-by-step plan for dealing with your child.s ADD. It is based on three approaches: audit, action, and assessment. Each chapter introduces a new step on the path, and each includes an audit, to help you clarify potential sources of your child.s behaviour; action, or activities that offer specific strategies of change that can be implemented immediately; and assessments, to help you evaluate whether the plan is working.
The chapters are organised so that important pathways can be charted and easily reviewed. Since every child is unique, any treatment plan needs to be specially fitted to the individual. In my experience most children benefit from the use of more than one approach.
This book combines the best of what traditional and alternative medicine have to offer at this time.First, do no harm.ll offer my advice and suggestions on methods that include drugs and medications, counselling and biofeedback, electromagnetic treatments, biocleansing, nutritional adjustments, strategies for sleep disturbances, neurotherapy, and self-development management.
Together, we will create an individualised assessment of the ADD symptoms for your child. Together, we will create a plan for treatment.ve all been used successfully and all are based on scientific methodology.
Family Healing
s symptoms. It may take time to find a treatment or a combination of treatments that work for your child. A parent.s impatience with treatment can be misinterpreted by the ADD child as a criticism. You don.t want your child to fear that his parents have lost hope.
s symptoms are treatable. The treatment path you follow on this journey to a better life for your ADD child may very well bring your family closer together than it has ever been.ve seen it happen many times. At some junctures the important challenges may be related not to the symptom resolutions of ADD, but to the personal or interpersonal growth of the family. If that is all that happens, that is enough, because that is what will endure.
--This text refers to the Paperback edition. Show moreForeward by Dr. Phil McGraw
Preface: Sharing the Journey
Acknowledgements
1. Taking a Step on the Healing Path
2. The Healing Home
3. Ending the Child's ADD Game
4. Taking Charge of the Diagnosis and Labels
5. Taking Control of the Medication Madness
6. Stress: An Enemy or a Friend
7. Detoxifying the Diet and the Environment
8. The Hero's Nutritional Plan
9. Healing Sleep
10. Train the Brain Biofeedback Approaches
11. Healing Sounds
12. Body Electric
13. Spiritual Healing
14. Healing Family Conflicts
15. Educational Strategies
16. The Game Plan
Afterword
Recources
Index
Dr. Frank Lawlis is a renowned psychologist, researcher, and counselor with more than thirty-five years' experience working with families. He is the cofounder of the Lawlis and Peavey Centers for Psychoneurological Change and was named a fellow by the American Psychological Association. Dr. Lawlis is also the chief content adviser for the Dr. Phil Show.
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